Texas Potato Salad
When you run across a bag of potatoes you bought in the early days of the pandemic, and they’re starting to sprout roots, it’s time to make Texas Potato Salad. This is a true comfort classic that goes with any grilled or smoked meat—chicken, brisket, burgers, we’re getting hungry just thinking about it.
You can identify Texas Potato Salad by its signature yellow tone, which comes from the egg yolks and a squirt of yellow mustard. Our recipe is here, but it’s really more like a set of guidelines. You should use white or red potatoes, not russets which will fall apart in cooking. You need celery for crunch, some chopped onions for funk, pickle relish or chopped pickles for tartness and ideally a bit of pimento or roasted red pepper for color. Mediocre potato salad tastes like undercooked or underseasoned potatoes; this should have an assertive, salty-sour taste. However, let it sit for a few hours before you do your final seasoning or add too much vinegar because it will definitely pick up flavor during that time.
Still got potatoes to deal with? Then make German-style potato salad! This relies on bacon and bacon fat, onions which have softened in that fat, a generous amount of cider vinegar and… wait for it… MSG. But don’t worry, the amount you’ll use is about the same as in a couple servings of Hidden Valley Ranch Dressing so your guests shouldn’t have a problem with it. (Of course, you can also leave it out, but we’ve compared and it definitely tastes better with MSG.)
If you’ve STILL got potatoes after all that, make Potato Chip Pizza. Two of a guy’s favorite things in one food! Then go out for some nice solitary exercise and work off all those carbs.
